Saturday, April 10, 2004
Spent yesterday, listening to vans pulling up and driving off outsside the flat. Kind of expected him to come.
But of course nothing, no phonecall either. It's funny how quickly he decides to stay away. It's never like he's missing out. Only like I will suffer.
And I am feeling very lonley, at a loose end.
Vee is deep in a gamecube game, he only surfaces for food, Ace is in Chamonix skiing with her dad, and I'm just here in the flat, bored aand unhappy. It's holiday time, and I am alone again.
I keep wanting to ring up and tell him how it's obvious how he feels, how little effort he puts in, how he relishes any excuse not to come, but what is the point? I might as well sit it out. Not give in. I am not sorry. He always messes me about, cancels, forgets, rearranges without warning, and Im fed up. The fact that he has now taken on Q, his first son, full time, without talking to me about it has just made things worse. He can only visit on Saturdays now, it's official, and that is just bollox.
But of course nothing, no phonecall either. It's funny how quickly he decides to stay away. It's never like he's missing out. Only like I will suffer.
And I am feeling very lonley, at a loose end.
Vee is deep in a gamecube game, he only surfaces for food, Ace is in Chamonix skiing with her dad, and I'm just here in the flat, bored aand unhappy. It's holiday time, and I am alone again.
I keep wanting to ring up and tell him how it's obvious how he feels, how little effort he puts in, how he relishes any excuse not to come, but what is the point? I might as well sit it out. Not give in. I am not sorry. He always messes me about, cancels, forgets, rearranges without warning, and Im fed up. The fact that he has now taken on Q, his first son, full time, without talking to me about it has just made things worse. He can only visit on Saturdays now, it's official, and that is just bollox.
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