Friday, January 28, 2005
Today, is my dear, fucked-up , junkie baby father loves, 40th birthday.
My hope is that this sobering reality might kick start in him a desire for living another 40 years, so's he can at last begin to live more soberly. I'd love to see how our lives would turn out, if he began to operate at full power. I think he could be so dynamic. He is so dynamic, right inside himself, and beautiful, and charming, and funny.
That is why I selected him of course. *deep breath* There was this excellent post on Urban, which is such an excellent and excting place, all about the importance breathing. How breathing is a spiritual thing.
With regard to my own health, I am begining to feel that if I listen out carefully, AND follow the signs, the right path to restored health will be shown to me.
I've been paniking a bit because I am unable to follow the same plan of action as last time it was found I had 'abnormal' cells, all the giving everything up and and mainly the acupuncture side of it that resulted in nights of deep and peaceful slumber, which I am not getting at the moment, very often/hardly at all.
However, I think I am developing stratagies for dealing with this without having to have anyone stick pins in me,
the worrying thing is I feel like I need instant results, and my ways are slow. Like the Tai-Chi, must give that another chance.
Drinking lots of water,
Juicing every day,
remembering to breath in and out properly *desperate for a smiley here*
long walks,
Camomile tea at night...
buy that blood bed i've been thinking about for so long, and give myself every chance....
the list is on-going. I am open.
My hope is that this sobering reality might kick start in him a desire for living another 40 years, so's he can at last begin to live more soberly. I'd love to see how our lives would turn out, if he began to operate at full power. I think he could be so dynamic. He is so dynamic, right inside himself, and beautiful, and charming, and funny.
That is why I selected him of course. *deep breath* There was this excellent post on Urban, which is such an excellent and excting place, all about the importance breathing. How breathing is a spiritual thing.
With regard to my own health, I am begining to feel that if I listen out carefully, AND follow the signs, the right path to restored health will be shown to me.
I've been paniking a bit because I am unable to follow the same plan of action as last time it was found I had 'abnormal' cells, all the giving everything up and and mainly the acupuncture side of it that resulted in nights of deep and peaceful slumber, which I am not getting at the moment, very often/hardly at all.
However, I think I am developing stratagies for dealing with this without having to have anyone stick pins in me,
the worrying thing is I feel like I need instant results, and my ways are slow. Like the Tai-Chi, must give that another chance.
Drinking lots of water,
Juicing every day,
remembering to breath in and out properly *desperate for a smiley here*
long walks,
Camomile tea at night...
buy that blood bed i've been thinking about for so long, and give myself every chance....
the list is on-going. I am open.
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