Thursday, September 18, 2003
X STAYS INSIDE>
Hmm... still no baby, and no siggn. Its good really that I've hung on so long. Ripe and ready, but now I am anxious for it to begin.
Xes' dad is in a bad way. V. depressed. I think when the baby arrives, he will cheer up.
At least I am praying he will.
I so so want him to be happy.
Hmm... still no baby, and no siggn. Its good really that I've hung on so long. Ripe and ready, but now I am anxious for it to begin.
Xes' dad is in a bad way. V. depressed. I think when the baby arrives, he will cheer up.
At least I am praying he will.
I so so want him to be happy.
Monday, September 15, 2003
TODAY X IS DUE.
My belly is so full. And right now, so tight.
I cried yesterday because it was so nearly all over. Very proberbly my last pregnancy.
Tonight, I am all alone in my flat.
Wondering and waiting. Practice contractions coming throughout the day and me unsure of the moment when Braxton hicks suddenly becomes LABOUR>
A Show, yes, thats what I'm waiting for, a show.
My waters breaking, and then, suddenly, I'll be in a new phase of my life.
The waiting will be over, and hard work begins in earnest.
I'm scared of single parenthood. Still I'm scared of bloody everything.
My belly is tight.
My belly is so full. And right now, so tight.
I cried yesterday because it was so nearly all over. Very proberbly my last pregnancy.
Tonight, I am all alone in my flat.
Wondering and waiting. Practice contractions coming throughout the day and me unsure of the moment when Braxton hicks suddenly becomes LABOUR>
A Show, yes, thats what I'm waiting for, a show.
My waters breaking, and then, suddenly, I'll be in a new phase of my life.
The waiting will be over, and hard work begins in earnest.
I'm scared of single parenthood. Still I'm scared of bloody everything.
My belly is tight.
Thursday, September 11, 2003
I am listening to the mighty Sean Paul. Mighty!
Rhythms. good for me and my baby. swinging hips, well im trying, have a little go. Just hanging out with my baby. Inside for just a bit more.
I FEEL SO STRANGE. Its a unique little moment in life and I'd be a fool to do anything other than savor every last second.
Life is precious.
EVERY MOMENT COUNTS>
buzzing, buzzin down my legs, the baby head press, and as sean says i dont mean to brag but every day i go to shag...
Me and my baby we love dance hall. we're girating on the stall as I type this SMILING SMILINg.
Blimey this feels happy. And loads of my friends have been ringing and drawing closer. I feel quite safe.
Safe protected and loved.
Rhythms. good for me and my baby. swinging hips, well im trying, have a little go. Just hanging out with my baby. Inside for just a bit more.
I FEEL SO STRANGE. Its a unique little moment in life and I'd be a fool to do anything other than savor every last second.
Life is precious.
EVERY MOMENT COUNTS>
buzzing, buzzin down my legs, the baby head press, and as sean says i dont mean to brag but every day i go to shag...
Me and my baby we love dance hall. we're girating on the stall as I type this SMILING SMILINg.
Blimey this feels happy. And loads of my friends have been ringing and drawing closer. I feel quite safe.
Safe protected and loved.
Wednesday, September 10, 2003
Hective sent off to Viglen for a spare part, and then, amazingly, fixed this old machine, putting me once again in cyber space.
X IS READY!
X IS READY!!
And I am trying to face up to the ensuing reality.
If I can deal with it well, the pain, that is of child birth, I will have made the whole family stronger.
Its sxceting to get the computor back today 'cos theres a Reclaim the Streets party on today. And the tv said the dark forces were sesrching the internet. Disess' very own site linked to urban 75, 2nd(!) after indy media. So its quite interesting despit my distance and uninvolvement with the whole afair.
I've got a big baby in my belly...
X IS READY!
X IS READY!!
And I am trying to face up to the ensuing reality.
If I can deal with it well, the pain, that is of child birth, I will have made the whole family stronger.
Its sxceting to get the computor back today 'cos theres a Reclaim the Streets party on today. And the tv said the dark forces were sesrching the internet. Disess' very own site linked to urban 75, 2nd(!) after indy media. So its quite interesting despit my distance and uninvolvement with the whole afair.
I've got a big baby in my belly...
I've been away.
My machine broke.
My machine broke.
